Louise Hinton, Lead Nurse at Kari Health says, “It’s extremely common, actually 1 in 5 women experience a level of anal incontinence after a vaginal delivery, ranging from a few embarrassing “accidents” to lifelong OASI (Obstetric Anal Sphincter Injuries). This will be temporary for some as they recover control after pelvic floor trauma, which can stem from pushing or stretching during labour. But for others who suffer nerve damage or sphincter injuries, it could be permanent. Your pelvic floor looks like the number 8 and controls both your vaginal opening and anus. Doing pelvic floor exercises is vital to reducing the chance of this happening and improving the condition. Faecal incontinence can be worse if you don’t eat enough fibre, drink too much alcohol and caffeine and don’t stay hydrated. Some women will have a dietary trigger, which can worsen it, and some will have no warning whatsoever. Establishing a bowel habit can help, but not in all cases. If you are experiencing anal incontinence, speak to your GP, Midwife or Health Visitor and ask for a referral to a physiotherapist who can help with pelvic floor injuries. You can also talk to an Obstetrician/Colorectal surgeon who deals with sphincter injuries and nerve damage to see what can be done.”

Kari Health‘s Integrative Counsellor and Psychotherapist Chloe Pollock says, “Also known as ‘baby blues’, low feelings commonly occur 3-5 days after birth and typically last 2ish weeks. You might experience unexplainable crying over small triggers, significant mood swings or be noticeably irritable. There may also be higher worry and anxiety. Roughly 80% of mothers will experience this, and it’s due to changes in hormone levels, tiredness, changes in routine and feeling overwhelmed. Simple things like eating well, resting as much as possible and doing something you love can all help. You might not be getting enough sleep, but you can look after yourself with self-care.

Louise Hinton, Lead Nurse at Kari Health, says, “It’s so normal to feel clunky after giving birth. And many women find that they continue to look pregnant for a few weeks. This is because it takes this time for the funds (the top of your uterus) to descend back into the pelvic cavity. It is an excellent idea (for weight loss and mental health) to do exercise post-partum. However, waiting until 3 – 6 months post-delivery is advised to allow for any internal and external healing. Running too soon can cause incontinence, injury or prolapse. So please don’t rush! Extra caution is needed to avoid injury for those who did not run pre- or during pregnancy. During pregnancy, the hormones relaxin and progesterone increase, allowing your ligaments to become looser to accommodate and support your body shape and size change. It takes 6 – 12 months for the ligaments to return to normal, so therefore some women find exercise more difficult post-partum, especially high impact or core strength workouts.”

Kari Health Psychotherapist Chloe Pollock says, “Bonding can be immediate for some, but for others, it can take time. And this is entirely normal. The process isn’t linear. You may find the attachment grows as you provide care for your newborn. Having a c-section or having a traumatic birth, which meant you did not get to see your newborn straight after birth, can make the bonding process challenging. Post-partum depression can also impact the mother’s ability to bond with their child. Challenging family dynamics can also be a factor. Bonding occurs in many ways, like skin-to-skin touch, feeding time, breastfeeding, and general care like bathing or rocking them to sleep. The love you have for your child grows and grows, and it’s ok if you don’t feel an instant rush of love. If a few months have passed and you still feel a lack of connection, speak to your GP or Health Visitor, and they can determine if a psychological or health issue may be playing a part in the challenges.”

Nurse and Midwife, Jasmine Sneyd says, “Hormone levels are high during pregnancy, and after birth, they decline. This fluctuation and your body’s attempt to regulate itself leads to night sweats. The most apparent sign of post-partum night sweats is waking up from sleep drenched or soaked in sweat. It’s completely normal and should only last a couple of days. You might get a mild fever when you first start producing milk, and it happens because the breasts can swell too much and become inflamed when your milk starts to come in. However, there are a few reasons why you might have a high temperature after birth, and it’s always best to get checked out by your GP or midwife, especially if you’ve had a c-section.”

Midwife Jasmine Sneyd says, “When one resumes personal and sexual relationships is a very individual and often cultural decision”, so please don’t feel there’s a rush. “Due to hormone changes during pregnancy and after birth, vaginal dryness may occur. It is important to have a postnatal check-up so you can discuss any concerns with a Midwife but try not to worry as it does take time. When you want to have sex and you’ve been given the go-ahead, a lubricant can moisten the area if you’re experiencing dryness. And your pelvic floor exercises are essential in this area too! As they can help with sexual health by bringing a good blood supply to the area.” And all of the things that help improve your emotions can also help here! If you’re happy and well-nourished, you’ll be far more likely to want to get it on with your partner.”

After you have had your baby, you can check the size of the separation with this simple technique.

Lie on your back with your legs bent and your feet flat on the floor.
Raise your shoulders off the floor slightly and look down at your tummy.
Using the tips of your fingers, feel between the edges of the muscles, above and below your belly button. See how many fingers you can fit into the gap between your muscles.

Ideally your doctor will examine you for DR in your six-week check-up, but it’s not unknown for this to be missed and it’s always worth checking yourself at home or book in with a women’s health physio for a post natal MOT and they will give you essential advice for recovery.

*Advice from NHSUK

What Are Baby Blues?

Having a baby can offset a whole range of emotions such as euphoria, excitement, and a deep abiding love for the life you’ve carried into the world. But it can also trigger negative emotions. Baby blues is a common feeling that most mothers feel. The term refers to feelings of sadness and you can feel weepy, be irritable towards your partner and loved ones, and even disconnected from the world around you. Medical experts state that baby blues usually occurs during the first week of pregnancy and is often confusing for women because the expectation is that we should feel jubilant and contented after having a baby.

What Does Postnatal Depression Feel Like?

Many conflate baby blues with postnatal depression because the symptoms can be quite similar, but they are in fact two separate conditions. Women tend to experience postnatal depression 2-8 weeks after giving birth. And while baby blues symptoms don’t usually stop you from functioning and living your day-to-day life, postnatal depression can be debilitating and may even require medical intervention and treatment in more severe cases. Dr Carla Runchman is a Clinical Psychologist who also writes about the psychology of motherhood on her blog Mama Diary. Speaking to The Mum Club, she says, “Whilst ‘baby blues’ in the first few days is normal, persistent low mood is not. This can look different for different people, but might typically include, feelings of hopelessness, struggling to feel connected with your baby, loss of appetite or eating more than normal, or feeling anxious or experiencing panic attacks. These are some of the most common signs of postnatal depression, but there are many complex factors that influence our mental health. One size does not fit all, and you are the expert on you.” If you’re currently feeling any of these symptoms, it’s crucial that you open up about it to your partner or a friend/relative, although we recognise that it isn’t always easy to do so when you are in the thick it. Acknowledging that you’re finding life after baby challenging is so difficult, but once you allow those thoughts and feelings to be expressed, you are on your way to getting better and getting the help and support you need. Get in touch with your health visitor, who will be well equipped to recognise the signs of postnatal depression and will be able to provide assistance. It’s also important to make an appointment with your GP so they can make an accurate assessment based on your symptoms. Treatments for postnatal depression include counselling or prescribed anti-depressants in some cases.

Serious cases of postnatal depression are best handled professionally, but there are some things you can incorporate into your daily life that benefit your mental state of mind.

Get Out of the House

This is such an overlooked tip, but it’s so super important that you get out as often as you can when you have a baby. We know it can often take such a huge effort to get up, get dressed as well as get baby fed, dressed and watered (especially during the midst of the sleepless night’s stage), but trust us – the pros certainly outweigh the cons. Fresh air and daylight are awesome mood boosters. They release serotonin that stabilises your mood and ignite feelings of happiness and contentment. Similarly, walking is also beneficial to your well-being. It improves your sleep quality, elevates your mood, and reduces stress and anxiety.

Delegate tasks

With so much pressure from society to be perfect mums we take it upon ourselves to do everything around the house when we’ve just had a baby. From cooking organic meals, ensuring the house is spotless at all times, to catering to baby’s every whim – it’s no wonder that we’re often left feeling exhausted and deflated. Dr Carla explains why delegation is fundamental, stating: “You must ensure your basic needs are being met. Can someone look after the baby while you have a shower, take a nap or eat some delicious, nourishing food? These very simple acts of self-care can make all the difference to how you feel in the early, chaotic days after giving birth.”

Minimise Social Media Activity

While it can definitely be a force for good and connect us with like-minded individuals, endless hours of scrolling can indeed contribute to negative emotions such as social status anxiety, FOMO, unrealistic life expectations, anxiety, and depression. So keep your social media usage to a minimum.

Get. Some. Sleep. *When You Can

We can imagine the eye roll at this heading, but we’re going to say it anyway: quality sleep is essential to your wellbeing. Yes, we know when the baby sleeps it gives you the perfect opportunity to catch up on the washing, house chores, the latest episode of Sex Education. But please try and sleep. There are so many awesome physical and mental health benefits from sleeping. It moderates your stress levels, energises you, reduces inflammation, improves your concentration, and detoxifies your brain!

Talk, Then Talk Some More.

We can’t emphasise enough how important it is to talk to someone if you’re feeling low. Even if you feel it’s of little importance because your sadness only feels fleeting and surface-level – talk anyway. Most of us have experienced mental health challenges related to pregnancy and childbirth, and it’s high time we start normalising that.